Peace Talks have Unequivocally Broken Down

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The news that cats are evil and planning world domination was recently exposed on this website.

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Above you have pictures of the aftermath. In a bloody backlash, felines all over the world rounded on their canine counterparts, blaming them for the leak of the story. No dog was safe in what is now being referred to as caninenacht. Reprisals were widespread and shocking, with puppies even being included in the onslaught of CATLIT (Cats Arise – Terrorize Local Impudent Two-Footers – i.e. humans!!). The question being asked is “why dogs?” Surely, CATLIT was formed to eradicate the human threat, as laid out in the manifesto of their leader, Dolph Kitler in his autobiography “Mein Lit”. The answer is that cats are not ready to take on the species homo sapiens and so have targeted a minority as a kind of training for the future war against humans. So, what can the dogs of this world do to protect themselves? Plans, as we can reveal, are already afoot.

Dogs Have Created a Special Air Service

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In response to the threat from above (cats are masters at jumping on their prey from great heights), our canine allies have formed a Special Air Service, to be brought in to action whenever the feline threat is on the move. There will be no hiding place for those rascally moggies once these chaps are up and running!

Dogs Are Combat Ready

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Stalwart chaps like Rex, above, will ensure that the feline threat is forever eradicated! This noble beast is seen here ready for flight on one of the many covert mission being launched by canis familiaris the world over. Although risky, Rex knows that his contribution is important – every dog can and must make a difference in this fight to the death!

The Intelligence Service is Sniffing Out Feline Terror Plans

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Cats are cunning, there is no doubt, and in return dogs must become ever more cunning in their mission to root out the feline threat. This little guy knows that careless talk costs lives and is keeping his eyes – and his ears – open for any possible information that may come his way. Bravo, Max!

Troops are Inspected by the Drill Sergeant Every Day

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Most dogs are now undergoing highly secret but methodical military training in preparation for the storm that must come. There is a highly sophisticated infrastructure already in place which aims to usurp the evil cat empire – from within if necessary!

They Are in Secret Talks with the Armies of Other Species

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Dogs know that they cannot win the war on their own so are in talks with a variety of other species in an attempt to coordinate and strengthen the response to the terrorist activities of the cats. Here. We see secret negotiations with the Korean army – top secret information is shared between the two sides in a sign of mutual reconciliation and trust. Top Ho, Comet. Well done, boy!

Dogs are Alert to Infiltration

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Every corner of life is being infiltrated by cat propaganda and it is every dog’s duty to keep a watchful eye out for signs that the feline threat is closing in. Where possible the dog uses every natural advantage it has in the unflinching fight against the evil empire of the kitten.

Specialized Military Tacticians are Boning Up on Strategy

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Cats are not the only ones to have genius on their side and here we see top military tactician, Lady, boning up on tactics to help in this struggle between good and evil. It is hoped that with Lady’s help this war can come to an end earlier than is possibly hoped.

Spies Have Been Dispatched to Infiltrate Cat Strongholds

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Cats are the slyest creatures on the planet and to combat that a specialized group of canine spies has been formed in order to spy on the creatures as they plan world domination. Here, Bonzo takes up position outside the stronghold of the cats, silently watching out for new evidence that cats have created a MOMD (Moggy of Mass Destruction).

New Technologies are Used in the Struggle

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Dogs, too, can use new technology as a powerful tool in their fight for freedom against the tyranny that is cat. Here, a young recruit works doggedly on a top secret project that will help rid the world of the cat threat once and for all. Keep up the good work, Taffy!

Full Military Training is Essential at a Young Age

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As a counter to the CATLIT youth organization, the decision has recently been made for universal conscription and that means that full military training must start at a very early age. Here we see a conscript in the full flush of youth, practicing his climbing skills in preparation for future hazardous missions.

They Have Proof that cats are inter-breeding with aliens and have produced a MOMD – Moggy of Mass Destruction

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It is with great regret that we must inform you of the passing of the canine secret agent, Bonzo, who was pictured above. However, Bonzo did not make the ultimate sacrifice for nothing. Moments before his death he was able to upload this picture of his killer. He had discovered the truth that the cats have been secretly creating a MOMD (Moggy of Mass Destruction). This cat-alien hybrid is the proof that canine spies the world over have been seeking. Now the truth can at last be revealed to an unbelieving world! Bonzo, we salute you!